New Wine N&E 2009

I wasn't really looking forward to New Wine this year, having moved churches and then towns. I planned to keep myself to myself, work hard on team and read and sleep in the afternoons. It was a good policy. As I'd only planned to do things by myself ,and I am now quite used to going places on my own, it was a bonus to be invited out for coffee with friends.

The most enjoyable part about the week was being on team once again. It's now the 5th year that I have been on Boulder Gang/Rock Solid team and it's great to see the same faces year on year. I love having the opportunity to chat to a different bunch of kids, get to know a bit about them, help them to make friends with each other... and then spend the evenings moving around the floor splitting up playfighting boys! Although I went to New Wine with every intention of it being my last, I left feeling less sure.

Still, I feel myself to be right on the edge of comfort (and often far beyond it!) with some of New Wine's teaching and the way things are done. This year there was a focus on prophecy. In one of the team times we had to get into 3s... pray for words or pictures for each other... 5 minutes each.... Sound familiar?! Anyway, this time I laid out my thoughts on the matter right before we began and didn't stress myself over trying to hear some obscure word from the Lord in my time limit and so avoided any Clover advert embarassments. We fortunately ran out of time before getting to the point where the other 2 would be praying for words for me.

I continue to wonder: Is God really all that bothered about giving individuals small words of comfort to already comfortable Christians on a holy holiday? I don't recall Him being like that in the Bible. It all made me think of Professor Trelawney from the Harry Potter books. She's an old fraud. And so I felt like an old fraud giving strangers words of prophecy that I'd pulled out of thin air. But, like Professor Trelawlney, that is not to say that God might use me as a prophet when He so wishes. Not when I wish. Professor Trelawney is an old fraud, but she's only in post because of a true prophecy she once gave, and she has no idea that she gave it.

As well as prophecy there was rather a lot of time spent praying for healing for children again, as last year, but I was glad that one evening was devoted to praying for children who were 'sad, maybe because of something from home or school'. I continue to wonder about praying for healing. I come with very low expectations, reluctant to be there and witness a child be disappointed as a genuine illness or disability remains when other children seem to be healed of minor complaints. One girl really touched my heart when, after praying for her, she said "Nothing. But I pray a lot for healing. I know that God will heal me one day." I told her how mature and strong she was and how proud I was of her. But how I longed that it would be she who would experience a miracle.